Buffalo, tell us…
Where have your mighty wings gone to?
Gimme celery.

Missed phone calls and text
Cingular? Am I forsaken?
Blow off photo class.

Sharing the office
Easy to forget there’s 9 peeps
He-he, Tom just burped. 

Poor deceased Kermit
Have you donated your organs?
You’re now just dishrags.

Birds attack my legs
Can you blame them? You want ‘em too
My cheese flavored pants.

Seventy docs to
Portible Document Format
I need an intern.

Do I need a break?
Does hunger consume from within?
Wholefoods, git er dun.

Hey there rich asshole
Sure, you have a sweet boat outside
Smell that? Pissed in it.

Olympics thinks tech
“Windows Vista? Sounds like it’s crap”
Wow, jocks know their shit.

Huge mountain of sodas
Water and coffee — second rate!
Damn card minimums.

Man ties shoes near water
“Push him in! Push him in! Woo hoo!”
People think I’m weird.

Altoids attack the mouth
Cinnamon fires scorch and burn
Sure glad pee doesn’t.

An apocalypse
Turn to Greg, Mike and I for help
OMG Zombies!

A slow afternoon
Trying to stay awake is hard
I’ll be reading Fark.

Female cheer coach nailed
A seventeen year old student
Where’s the crime? She’s hot.

Bill farts in his sleep
“I wake my wife up,” he remarked
What pride he must have.

Parent testimonials
They’re saying their kids dig our school
Schnanigans!

Russians get sex prizes
Boinks on September 12th win cars
I’m happy with “thanks jerk.”

“Hey, edit this JavaScript”
Sure, wait till now, I mean, after all…
IT’S ALMOST FUCKING 5!